Nice try.

But we all know it’s those damn unicorns!

WASHINGTON – It may sound far-fetched, but federal regulators are studying whether sudden acceleration in Toyotas is linked to cosmic rays.

Radiation from space affects airplanes and spacecraft and triggers errors in computer systems, but has received scant attention in the auto industry.

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0 comments Sunday, March 28, 2010

Forget it, Jake. It's Pittsburgh.

From the Post-Gazette:

Police said a man will be charged with public drunkenness after a witnesses saw him attempting mouth-to-mouth resuscitation on a road-killed opossum.

State police said they charged Donald Wolfe, 55, of Brookville, Jefferson County, after they arrived at the scene on Route 36 in Oliver Township around 3 p.m. Thursday.

Trooper Jamie Levier said several witnesses saw Mr. Wolfe near the animal. The trooper said one person saw Mr. Wolfe kneeling before the animal and gesturing as though he were conducting a seance, while another saw the mouth-to-mouth attempt.

[more] via Police: Man tried to revive dead possum; alcohol involved.

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0 comments Saturday, March 27, 2010

The Unbearable Lameness of Columbus, Chapter 467

You asked for ‘em, we’ve got ‘em!  Celebrity impersonator bank robbers:

COLUMBUS, Ohio—The FBI is looking for a bank robbery suspect who allegedly demands money because he’s late on his house payment.

usbankrobbery031110… A male entered the Giant Eagle at 4780 W. Broad St. at about 10:21 a.m. Thursday. The grocery is located in the Lincoln Village Shopping Center on the city’s Southwest Side.

He approached a teller at the US Bank located inside the grocery.

The suspect said he was robbing the bank and wanted the teller’s money. He said if she cooperated, she wouldn’t get hurt, according to the FBI.

While the teller was removing money from her drawer, the suspect said he was late on his house payment and wanted all her money, an official report said.

Although no weapon was observed, the teller complied and gave the suspect money from her drawer.

The suspect fled the scene.

The suspect was described as a white male who is between 30 and 40 years old. He is 5 feet 8 inches tall with a thin build. He has a “scruffy” appearance and was wearing a green baseball cap, dark goggles and a dark, puffy coat.

Authorities also said he resembles Bono from the rock band U2.

via FBI Calls Bank-Robbery Suspect ‘Bono Bandit’ | NBC4i.com.

0 comments Thursday, March 11, 2010

He’s baaack….

Jon Ronson resurfaces at the Guardian, with a piece on Paul Davies, who is not as flaky as he seems here:

If we are ever contacted by aliens, the man I’m having lunch with will be one of the first humans to know. His name is Paul Davies and he’s chair of the Seti (Search For Extraterrestrial Intelligence) Post-Detection Task Group. They’re a group of the world’s most eminent scientists and will be, come the big day, the planet’s alien welcome committee. His is an awesome responsibility, and one he doesn’t take lightly.

“Imagine a civilisation that’s way in advance of us wants to communicate with us, and assist us in our development,” Paul says. He pushes his mackerel across his plate. “The information we provide to them must reflect our highest aspirations and ideals, and not just be some crazy person’s bizarre politics or religion.”

This is why, Paul says, he very much hopes that our opening communication with the aliens will be drafted by him. “All the attempts to send messages up so far have been very crass,” he says. “If you’re going to leave it up to the mob to decide what’s important, it’ll be this really cool video game. Or some sporting event. Or some rock group.”

“Do you have any idea of what you might say to the aliens?” I ask.

There is a short silence. “I do,” he says.

via First contact: The man who’ll welcome aliens | Jon Ronson | Science | The Guardian.

0 comments Monday, March 8, 2010

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